Modern-Day Motherhood
You’ve probably read other blogs, IG posts or reels saying the hardest part of motherhood is not dealing with our kids; it’s managing our own emotions. I would completely agree with this. I am definitely making an effort to measure my success as a mom in how I manage myself, not in what my kids accomplish. Managing our own emotions while our child is experiencing their big feelings (ie. tantruming), or biting our lip as our child makes a decision we disagree with or seeing our child suffer and feeling completely helpless - these are all examples of the big emotional challenges faced as mothers, as parents. We need to be able to hold a container big enough for their feelings AND our own while remaining neutral so the container doesn’t spill all over. THIS is the challenge. Now, let’s add to that container in modern-day motherhood:
Standards are higher (thanks social media) while motherhood support is lower.
Our time is stretched extremely thin.
We live more in isolation, with less contact with elders.
Part-time and flexible jobs are a privilege, not a norm.
We are being pulled away from our inner wisdom (hi Dr. Google and TikTok).
And more!
That container is already overflowing with expectation before the child is even born. I hear from clients on a regular basis what they are trying to manage. Each mom out there is trying her best, doing her best and kicking some a** in this world of impossible standards.
The solution? Prioritize motherhood care. Normalize it. Support it. Celebrate it. It’s time to dismantle the self-sacrificing, martyrdom paradigm of motherhood that’s been constructed. The reality is the more we care for ourselves, the more space we have in our container for our children. And isn’t that what all moms want - the best for our children? Our best is what’s best for our children. So let’s celebrate the mom who took time for herself. Let’s make childcare more accessible and improve the quality. Let’s take a serious look at the motherhood penalty. Let’s offer flexibility to support the mothers who are balancing career and family. Let’s keep going!
